Jane Darling in NO PARKING GIRL
by neverland soldier
Summary: Wendy's daughter, Jane moved from London to Mojave,California and had to deal with a CalTrans construction worker who wants to build a freeway there. Parody of Bugs Bunny cartoon:No Parking Hare. Jane's first Disney cartoon short.


Hello,fellow Neverlanders, I took time out from writing "Secret Weapons over Neverland" to write this short story, How Jane of Disney's "Return to Neverland", would be in her first Disney cartoon short.

Walt Disney Pictures

Presents

A Jane Darling cartoon

Jane Darling

In

"NO PARKING GIRL"

a parody of the Bugs Bunny cartoon: "No Parking Hare".

Jane Darling moved from London to Mojave, California, in which she had to deal with a Cal-trans

construction worker, who want to expand the Antelope Valley Freeway through there.

Character voiceovers:

Jane Darling……………Harriot Owens

Construction worker………Mel Blanc.

The Antelope Valley Freeway expands from Los Angeles through Palmdale and Lancaster and is now expanding to Mojave. Here we see a Cal-trans construction worker breacking rocks with an air hammer.

A few feet is Jane Darling's house, In her bedroom Jane is sleeping, the vibration of the air hammer shooked the house, she moved to Mojave from London the previous year. Jane woke up, walks to the bathroom to turn off a drippy faucet, then went back to bed. The construction worker then break rocks with a mallet, the chandalear shok so vibrantly that it fell with a crash. That woke Jane with a shock.

(Jane): " Oh my Gosh,What's going on here?"

She got out of bed, fixed some Earl Grey tea in the kitchen, walked to the front door and see the construction worker working.

(Jane): "Er, what's up, Goven'r?"

That drew the construction worker's attention.

(Construction Worker):"Huh?, Well for your information, Pajama Girl, we're building a freeway."

(Jane):"Oh!, so that's it, Blimey!, I thought I had a case of bloomin' termites, Well, thanks for the info, ol 'chap and no hard feeling, Happy Freeway." She then went back inside her home, only that she rushed out in shock, she screamed:

(Jane):"FREEWAY,Hold it, Mate, Hold it, Hollllld it, there must be some mistake, you see a freeway through here would wreck my home."

(Construction Worker):"Well, why don't you sell it?"

(Jane):"Sell it?, I just moved here from London, last year."

(Construction Worker):"Well, if you don't move, we'll blast you out."

(Jane):"Oh no, a girl's home is her castle, and I'm stayin' right here, Mate."

(Construction Worker):"Oh yeah?"

(Jane): "Yeah!, and you won't make me move, smarty pants."

(Construction Worker):"Oh yeah?"

(Jane):"Righto, Mate."

Jane went inside her home, as the construction worker looked on.

(Construction Worker):"Heh , heh, heh, Can't make a move ,huh?, We'll see about that."

One hour later, the Cal-tans construction worker placed dynamite around Jane's home and hooked the wire to the dentaiator. He dentinates.

BLAM!

When the smoke cleared, much of the ground were blasted, but to the construction worker's surprise Jane's home is still standing now on what look like a plateau, with the length of her property and the depth of 50 feet.

(Jane): "I hear you knockin', but you can't come in."

She then emptied the waste basket into the garbage can, while whistled a tune.

(Jane):"Er, watch out for that first step, Mate, it's a lulu."

(Construction Worker): "So, she wants to play, huh ?, Ok."

30 minutes later, the Construction Worker, climb up a ladder, up the plateau, carrying a shotgun, an axe, and his mallet, to the level of Jane's house, then called out:

(Construction Worker):"Ok Girl, You asked for it and you're gonna get it, but good, Huh, huh, huh,."

He then looked down to see Jane, sawing the ladder from under the house through a hole on the side of the plateau.

(Construction Worker):"Oooooooh!"

Jane, then remove one of the sawed-off portion of the ladder, the gently with a touch of her finger push the other sawed-off portion of the ladder off.

(Construction Worker): "Oh No!"

He then plunged down to the ground, before he hit the ground, Jane opened the door in the plateau,

And using a hoe pulled a container of cement toward her, so the construction worker landed in the cement with a SPLASH! He got out and walked away but the cement hardened till he can't move and collapse on the ground. He then push his head out of the cemented caccoon, confused.

Jane then sitting on her bed having her Earl Grey tea, and reading Edgar Allen Poe's "The Raven".

(Jane): reading:"While while I really napping, suddenly there came a tapping, as if someone's rapping,

rapping on my chamber door…."

The Construction worker, was at the same time trying to saw off the plateau, with a portable saw on a wagon, Jane inside paused and place a detour sign to the left side of her bed to lure the saw to the electric voltage box, then continues reading

(Jane): "…..this dark

visitor arrives at my chamber door….."

the construction worker receives an electric shock, lighting up like a neon light for five seconds.

(Jane):"…. Only then and nothing more."

15 minutes later ,Jane was playing her banjo singing:

(Jane):singing: "There isn't no place like a house on the ground, a house on the ground, a house on the ground, there isn't no place like a house on the ground, with that big fat goon up floating around……"

At the same time, the construction worker was hovering over Jane's home in a helicopter, and dropped a bomb in the chimney, the bomb bounce on Jane's bed, and ended up on the construction worker's hands.

BLAM!

When the smoke cleared, the construction worker was holding on the rotor, the rotor was sputtering.

One Hour later, the construction worker tries to pound Jane's home with a 60 lb. pounder, Jane emerged out the front door, found out, went inside, the emerge in disguise, wearing a construction worker's jacket over her nightgown, on her head is a construction worker's hard hat and wearing sunglasses.

(Jane): "Hold it, Bub, I'll give you a hand, Er, swing to the right, now back it up, a little, a little more, a little more, a little more to the right, up a little higher, higher, Hold it!, now swing back a foot,.. That's it!, Right on the button …." The pounder was over the construction worker's crane.

(Jane): "Ok, Mate, start pounding!"

The construction worker pound himself into the ground, crane and all.

30 minutes later, the construction worker worked up another plan to get rid of Jane, he connected some lead pipes as a ladder so he'll climb up the plateau, up to the ground level of Jane's house, carrying a large stick of TNT, he ficking his cigarette lighter, Jane opened up the door beneath the plateau, strikes a match and blow with her breath so the match move up the pipes, the match lit the fuse, just as the flame was lit on the lighter.

(Construction Worker):"Ahhhhhhh," he then turn to realize the fuse was already lit.

(Construction Worker): "Oh, Oh!"

BLAM!

The explosion shattered the pipe ladder, and the construction worker landed on the ground, he then gathered up some of the pipes and went to a shed leaving a trail of pipes to it.

30 minutes later, the Construction worker hadn't giving up, he back up a cement mixer from the "20 Mule Team Cement Company", going to douse and cover Jane's home with cement, Jane open up her umburella as the cement doused and cover her and her home.

The Construction Worker stepped out of the truck and was shocked and put his hand over his eyes, Jane had fooled him again, using a trowel ,she improves her home, put her mail box on the cement and closed the front door inside, with an iron door.

The next morning, the headlines of the Mojave Daily News read: "CITY OF MOJAVE COMPROMISES WITH 14-YEAR-OLD GIRL! Antelope Valley Freeway will go through! " A picture of an angelic Jane Darling was on the left corner.

The Antelope Valley Freeway went around Jane's home, Jane emerged at the front door, holding her cup of Earl Grey tea.

(Jane): "The santity of the home, must be preserved."

THE END!

I'll be working more on "Secret Weapons over Neverland " soon.

FAITH,TRUST &PIXIE DUST!

P.S. check out the original Bugs Bunny cartoon:No Parking Hare" on AOL Video, that gave me the idea for this story


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